


Forgive Me, Ma Vhenan

by VintageSkies



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Ancient Elvhen, Angst, Break Up, Crestwood, Elves, Elvhen, Endgame, F/M, Gen, Inner Circle - Freeform, Post-Break Up, Post-Endgame, Skyhold, Solas Spoilers, Solavellan, Spoilers, crestwood date, dai spoilers, ma vhenan, otp: ma vhenan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-13
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-03-17 15:32:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,041
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3534710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VintageSkies/pseuds/VintageSkies
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This piece pans over an extended period of time but focuses on three main events: the breakup scene, immediately after at Skyhold, and the final celebration.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Forgive Me, Ma Vhenan

“I have distracted you from your duties, and I am sorry. It won’t happen again.”

“Solas? I…what?”

“I never meant to hurt you, _ma vhenan._ ”

“It’s a bit late for that, don’t you think?”

Solas shifted his weight from his right foot to his left foot, then back again. The containers strung across his back softly jingled as he did so, barely audible above the rush of the falls. He glanced at the ground, focusing his attention on a single blade of grass that sprung from the earth like a dagger through a heart. He couldn’t bring himself to look at her, to look at those amethyst eyes. He had already caused enough pain, hadn’t he?

“I-” He raised his steel-blue eyes slowly, a cowering puppy awaiting its punishment. Aerys stood with her bare arms crossed before her chest not in that precious way she did when he made a comment about the Dalish; no, in the same way a templar might hold a shield before an apostate. Solas stiffened and angled his chin upwards slightly as he felt his shoulders tense.

“I will see you back at Skyhold, Inquisitor."

§ §

{At Skyhold}

Solas stood hunched over his desk. The scribbled notes on the parchment in front of him danced across the page with such ferocity he could not focus. He squinted his eyes to no avail, and, feeling the inkling of a headache, he straightened.

At that moment, the door flew open as his precious _da’assan_ sauntered in. No, he mustn’t think of her like that anymore.

 He tried to pull his gaze away, but like the Fade, he could not resist her. His stomach lurched at the sight of her, and for a moment, he felt his face flush. He let his eyes fall upon the mural behind her now. The silhouette of wolves sent a wave of relaxation over his body that made the tips of his fingers prickle.

“How may I be of service, Inquisitor?”

“Inquisitor? Is that what I’ve been demoted to?” Her gaze was sharper than that from one of Leliana’s ravens.

“Now is not the time to muddy the waters with such emotional conversation, not with such an important battle ahead of us. I promise you, if we are both alive after it, I will explain everything.”

Silence. Every second that past drove the knife deeper into his chest until he felt like he was suffocating. He tried to look past her, to acknowledge her but not look into her eyes the way he had that first time in the Fade.

He didn’t have to stare into them to see the brim of tears that was accumulating within them. Without a word, she turned and left the way she came, slamming the door behind her with a sound that would have made him flinch if he had been capable of moving.

He looked down at his notes and watched as the stain of a single tear branched out and soaked into the fibers in the corner of the parchment. He ripped it from the rest of the page, angry for such a display of weakness.

He turned, silently, and picked up his paintbrush. It was going to be a long night

§ §

{After the final events concerning Corypheus and the orb}

Aerys looked around the hall and smiled to herself. It was so surreal – all these people here, supporting her. And yet, she still felt alone. All the smiles in the room, all the glistens in everyone’s eyes, all the uproarious laughter that echoed off the walls, none of it would bring him back.

The smile melted from her face as she approached the door to her quarters. As her hand reached for the handle, she turned around. Everyone was staring, and although she had gotten used to the feeling over the past few months, she certainly hadn’t begun to enjoy it. She forced her aching muscles to form a smile as her advisors led a uniform bow in her honor. She nodded her head ever-so-slightly in return before she turned back to the door and trudged up the steps.

She let her hand drag behind her on the railing; the chill against her fingertips somehow soothed the burning muscles in her legs. At the top of the steps, Aerys let out a soft sigh, one that would have shattered the eluvian of his soul, had he been present. Running a limp hand through her hair, Aerys scuffled across the floor and nearly tripped on the edge of the rug that covered much of the honey-toned wooden floor.

As she stood up and regained her balance, a black lump caught her attention. Something small lay on her pillow – had Sera snuck up here before the party? They would have to have a little discussion tomorrow.

As she approached, Aerys detected a leather cord and the shape of the black lump materialized into a ball of emotion so concentrated and robust, she felt the air knocked from her chest.

It was a wolf-jawbone necklace. Solas’ wolf-jawbone necklace.

Her vision blurred as she stepped closer to the pillow. She felt herself get dizzy, lightheaded, but then she remembered to breathe. She closed her eyes, took a breath, and struggled to push her eyelids open against the blanket of emotion that held them shut.

She glanced at the pillow, but the necklace was still there. Reaching her hands out, she gently picked it up. It was heavier than she expected – Solas had never let her hold it before. She let the cord dangle as she ran her fingertips across the grooves in the bone. Closing her fingers gently around the pendant, she moved to wipe a freshly-fallen tear from her cheek.

It was then that she noticed a small, torn piece of parchment. The ends were curled terribly, making it impossible to read what it said, although she could see the blackness of letters concealed on the inside. She placed the necklace softly on the bed and picked up the note. She unraveled it and held it by the tips of her fingers, struggling to give herself enough room to read it and hold it at the same time.

Inside, four words were written:

“Forgive me _, ma vhenan”_

 


End file.
